What We Offer You
Marriage and Relationship counselling
Help with anxiety and depression
Counselling for trauma, loss and grief
NeurOptimal brain training
Marriage and Relationship Counselling
No doubt you got together with your partner thinking this relationship is the best thing that ever happened to you. Or perhaps there were no fireworks, it just felt save and connected and that was good enough. Now you are wondering what happened to those experiences? How did you end up feeling distant, resentful, confused or angry?
May be life threw a few curb-balls at you both and your relationship deteriorated under the stress; or perhaps it was just time eating away at the patience and tolerance you brought into the relationship toward the things that did not really feel good to start with? Or may be what used to excite you in your partner is now the very thing that you cannot stand?
At any rate, if you are here, there is hope that you might use the crisis you are in to create something totally new. Relationship counselling offers the opportunity to sort through your mess, come back to the basics of your love and invites you to grow into places that you would not go to on your own. In fact, that is what all relationships are about: to help us expand into those places that we fear most. Can you accept the challenge you are currently facing as an invitation for growth?
If you are ready for this, get in touch to book a free check in session with Mattie today to see how this journey could look for you and your partner.
Help with Anxiety and Depression
The numbness of depression and the agitation of anxiety are your brain’s solution to a problem. What you experience is never a result of who you are but of what happened in your life and the skills you were able to learn that would help you deal with difficulties.
If your brain responds with depression or anxiety to your life, it is out of lack of knowing what else to do. It makes sense to shut down a system that consistently gets overwhelmed with incoming feelings of pain, loneliness, abandonment or worthlessness.
Depression ‘feels better’ than any of those painful emotions. It also makes sense that a brain that is consistently exposed to either real or perceived danger develops a permanently activated alarm system.
In counselling we unravel your story back to its beginnings. We support you to learn to bear and process the more painful feelings, to create internal safety, slow down and ‘reset’ your alarm system, to heal emotional hurt, change the story you tell yourself about yourself if it doesn’t work for you, relate to people you love in a way that makes you feel connected – including with yourself, and discover the strengths you already have that you can bring to this process of change and growth.
Depression and Anxiety are not the end of your story, they are the beginning. Growth is always painful as we let go of what we know and move toward what we want.
You can come and check out how Mattie can help you on your journey by
getting in touch to book a free check in session.
Loss, Grief and Change
As social beings we attach to people, places and things to feel save and have a sense of belonging. When we lose what belongs to us, we move into grief. And that hurts.
You may find this pain unbearable and respond with all kinds of ways to try to avert the pain. That is why grieving is so difficult. You might find you cannot sleep at all or way too much, you don’t want to eat or you can’t stop eating, you can’t stop crying or you are just numb and can’t cry at all.
In counselling we hold that space for you to help you through this painful process. Making meaning out of a changed situation takes time. And courage. And gentleness. And sometimes the wisdom of another when you just cannot see how you can move forward after your loss.
Because we have to attach to people, places and things to feel save, and we can therefore lose them, nature also has equipped us with the capacity to let go. Your pain might be a measure for your ability to love.
When you become overwhelmed with a situation in your life and have no other choice than to ‘freeze’, i.e. collapse, hide, submit or immobilise, your brain experiences trauma. The consequences of such an experience can be profound. You may find yourself incapable of building healthy relationships, you might lack the ability to trust yourself or anyone around you, you might be an over-pleaser, over-achiever, perfectionist or completely incapable of holding any job for long… Trauma creates chaos and can turn the survival-system switch on permanently. It messes with our memory, our relationships and our health.
Trauma causes behaviour changes; but it can also affect our physical health and our mental health as we continue to try and survive with an overstimulated brain. Constant headaches, tiredness, back pain, high blood pressure and many other ‘diffuse’ complaints can be responses to untreated trauma.
Neuroscience has given counselling a new edge in how to get back in control of your life. It is important for us to understand that we don’t always have full control over our choices, because our brain makes them for us. Counselling based on Neuroscience teaches you skills to settle down the survival brain, establish safety and learn how to increase a sense of control and connection so you can take charge again of your life and make competent decisions in favour of your health and wellbeing.
Mattie is our expert to help you overcome the repercussions of trauma. You can meet her in a free check-in-session.
When your brain works for you – the sky is the limit!
If you would be the most relaxed, focused, clear-minded, centred version of yourself that you could be right now, what would you do with your life?
There is a way of getting to this place available now, and you can try it here totally free. But read on first so you know more about what NeurOptimal brain training has to offer.
You can book a totally free trial session here.
Your brain is like the hardware in your computer: it needs to function in a coherent, connected and efficient way in order to provide you with the best experience of your life day-in-day-out. And it has the capacity to do just that.
The bad news is that due to a myriad of stresses we are exposed to on a daily basis, our brain tends to run on stress-hormones, keeping us stuck in a low- (or high-) level survival mode. Like your computer under ‘stress’, your brain responds with electric signals that are incoherent, too high or too low in frequency, non-communicative to other parts of the brain or non-rhythmical. All these kinds of disruptions lead to the common experiences of anxiety, depression, lack of memory or focus, inability to sleep, constant anger or frustration, hyper-tension and so on.
NOW there is a way to change this cycle
Neuroscience and computer science have enabled the development of a technology that reads your brainwaves and gives immediate feed-back to the brain, so it begins to move back to firing more coherent, rhythmical, connected and balanced electric signals.
Neurofeedback has been used successfully for over 20 years now. It has enhanced the performance of executives and athletes alike, it has helped children to focus at school, remain calm and relaxed during exam periods, the list is endless.
All you need to do is sit back with two sensors connected to your head and listen to music. When the computer detects a turbulence in your electric signalling, the music stutters, thus inviting the brain to come back to the present moment, much like when you drive your car over the elevated side lines on a highway. Over time, the brain learns to maintain a balanced state of focused relaxation and you begin to feel like the person you could be!
But don’t just take my word for it. Follow this link to watch the testimonials of those who have done the NeurOptimal training and then book a free session here.
Your brain: The possibilities are endless!!